Neti Pot...

I have a confession to make. I not only own a Neti Pot, I use it on a somewhat regular basis. Now I realize that some of you may not know what I'm talking about, and that is truly a shame. So I have found two splendid Youtube clips* that should clear things right up.

*These clips are not for the squeamish*

Standard Neti demonstration complete with “cool down” exercises.



This clip features the same model of Neti that I own. Kudos to the bearded man for creativity and sheer ballsy-ness. Cream of the Neti crop.



For the record, I look more like the stud in clip two when using my Neti than the pro in clip one. I think I swallowed more than ran out my nose on my first dozen attempts. Yeah I'm a slow learner.

Also, my life is neatly packed into 24-some boxes and I'm ready to roll. Oh yes and I've started a sultry internet love affair with yet another man. It was not on the agenda so I'm not sure how to feel about it. I'll give you details another day if I'm in the mood.

Hired...

That's right kiddies...I got my job in Chico! So in roughly two weeks I will have endless amounts of new blog material to throw at you. Bet you can't wait! I will be accepting visitors in my new home after June 1st. That means you Patty!

Wings...

Well I'm a rather Grumpy Gus these days and I have little to say. But I would like to wallow in one of life's most splendid moments... There is something so delightful about standing in line at Target with panty liners and a home pregnancy test that will not scan. And oh the clerk tried and the men behind me were patient. Finally we had success and I was on my way. Others may have been mortified but I enjoy shit like that. It could only have been improved with a loud speaker price check. Maybe next time... And no worries, I highly doubt I'm pregnant but I've managed to gain 5 pounds almost over night. I refuse to think it could be the excessive beer drinking I did while home. I just like to cover all my bases and make sure I won't need to track down McSteamy anytime soon.

Oh yeah...interview Tuesday.

There's No Place Like Home...

I have returned from the wild west (technically Midwest)! One solid week at home only confirms that there is indeed no place like home. Where else can I enjoy pumpkin pie for breakfast, sleep on a couch following WWIII, rendezvous with a man in camo ten years my senior, and drink my fill everyday all with the glorious knowledge that when the week is up I will click my slippers and land in CA, worry free.

And now to touch on a few items that were brought to my attention while home. For starters, my friends most likely think and in fact know I am crazy. They began to suspect this somewhere between the day I drew eyeliner dicks on their faces while they were passed out and the day I began quoting the Orbitz commercial. This information was further confirmed when I made two very important and hilarious pop culture references that had absolutely no impact on my cronies. Last time I checked we were indeed born within one year of each other and should therefor remember similar key points in our childhoods. But I have always been a bit suspicious of the date on my birth certificate... So just to clear up a those things I have included a few Youtube videos featuring the beloved Peppermint Patty and the Flowbee.

To see the inspiration for my Peppermint Patty mimic and character reference fast forward to 2:55 and watch three or four minutes. If time permits I suggest just watching the whole clip...it's a Charlie Brown classic afterall.



And for the grand finale...43 seconds of Flowbee heaven. My secret is out, and now everyone will know how I get my incredible just thoroughly sexed, tousled mane.